The Angel In the Library

Name:
Location: SomeWhere, Texas, United States

I'm a thirty-something, tattooed, immature Computer and Reference Librarian. I'm the New World Librarian. Gone are the buns and glasses on a chain. Instead, I opted for Chuck Taylors, blue jeans and tattoos!

Monday, March 21, 2005

Newman

As I write this, Newman is here using the public internet computers.
Ok, his name isn't Newman but I call him that because he bears a striking resemblance to Newman from Seinfeld.
There is something about this guy that really just rubs me the wrong way.
He's extremely unattractive but there are a lot of ugly people out there that don't irritate the hell out of me.
It's his attitude and the look he always has on his face, like he's smelling shit all the time.
He's so nosy. He's always peering at his neighbors monitor, reading their email.
It's because of him that I finally put little signs up saying "Please respect your neighbor's privacy."
He's got a really crappy attitude, too. He asked me one day in a rude tone, "Can I print?". I wanted to say, "I don't know, can you?". There is really very little appeal about him.
Imagine my surprise when one day, Newman came in with his child. Yes, someone actually procreated with this man.
His child, I call the marsupial because of his strange, close-set eyes, is not a horrible child, he's just 2 years old and doesn't like to sit in one spot for long. However, his father expects him to sit still while he checks his email, visits his favorite websites, etc.
If you've ever met or even if you've ever been a 2 year old, you KNOW this is not possible.
So, Newman will try to force the marsupial to sit in his lap or sit on the floor, quietly next to him and the marsupial will resist, quite loudly.
This goes on for about half an hour. Patrons all around are getting upset, *I* am getting upset and my coworkers keep calling my extension asking me when Newman and the marsupial are going to leave.

Once, someone asked me where the marsupial's mother is, since they can't believe anyone actually slept with this guy.
My response:
"Oh, she was gone as soon as the roofie wore off."

Friday, March 18, 2005

Circulation Clerk Requirements

Apparently, here at Little Library, literacy is not a prerequisite to work the front desk.
Our morning cirulation clerk - we'll call her Jane- is a hard worker and very efficient but damn near illiterate.
I was sitting at the reference desk one day when a particularly loud patron walked up to the circ desk and asked if we had any books by Bill O'Reilly.
Immediately she turned to her computer and I heard her typing. I knew this was trouble because #1 she can't spell and I knew O'Reilly would be out of her vocabulary's galaxy and #2 I knew we had all of them.
She then proceeded to tell the patron we did not have any books and as he started to walk towards the door I practically yelled, "Wait!".
I found his book for him and he left a happy patron.

It wasn't long ago that she came to my desk and said, "Aurora, this man on the phone wants a book about Excel but I can't find anything."
Well of course we have Excel books but I realized why she thought we didn't have any...she was typing "XL" in the card catalog.

My frustration level runs high at times.

Inaugural Post

Well here it is.
I'm going to start blogging about work here because I can't blog about it on my personal blog.
I don't want my "lovely" coworkers or patrons to ever find out I'm talking about THEM!

I've got a lot to say and funny stories about unusual people I hope to share in the coming days.