As I write this, Newman is here using the public internet computers.
Ok, his name isn't Newman but I call him that because he bears a striking resemblance to Newman from Seinfeld.
There is something about this guy that really just rubs me the wrong way.
He's extremely unattractive but there are a lot of ugly people out there that don't irritate the hell out of me.
It's his attitude and the look he always has on his face, like he's smelling shit all the time.
He's so nosy. He's always peering at his neighbors monitor, reading their email.
It's because of him that I finally put little signs up saying "Please respect your neighbor's privacy."
He's got a really crappy attitude, too. He asked me one day in a rude tone, "Can I print?". I wanted to say, "I don't know, can you?". There is really very little appeal about him.
Imagine my surprise when one day, Newman came in with his child. Yes, someone actually procreated with this man.
His child, I call the marsupial because of his strange, close-set eyes, is not a horrible child, he's just 2 years old and doesn't like to sit in one spot for long. However, his father expects him to sit still while he checks his email, visits his favorite websites, etc.
If you've ever met or even if you've ever been a 2 year old, you KNOW this is not possible.
So, Newman will try to force the marsupial to sit in his lap or sit on the floor, quietly next to him and the marsupial will resist, quite loudly.
This goes on for about half an hour. Patrons all around are getting upset, *I* am getting upset and my coworkers keep calling my extension asking me when Newman and the marsupial are going to leave.
Once, someone asked me where the marsupial's mother is, since they can't believe anyone actually slept with this guy.
"Oh, she was gone as soon as the roofie wore off."